Dare to bare your emotions

A happening day today. 
A day that had its ups and down. Could be the hormones, could be that I am a sensitive person, could be that I take things personally and could be that I think way too much. But yes, a tiring and happening day that surprised me a bit actually. 
I am a woman with emotions, one who feels and most of all, lets herself be vulnerable to emotions. I am available, for my feelings, for my emotions and for myself. 
Like I mentioned, I started going to Yoga classes and the wise yogi told me that one must learn to love oneself to be capable enough to love someone else. I love myself and I take pride in it. I take care of myself. I take care of myself, admire my spirits, I spend money on myself, my upkeep and things and people that please me. However my husband tells me that I am bad at ( you see a teacher wouldn't use that b word, but he isn't one) being nice to myself- I let things get to me. 
So, stepping out of the previous paragraph where almost every sentence started with I, me, myself, I now want to move on to how things can get to me and have an immense effect on me. Being sad over things that shouldn't bother me is a quality that I possess, a personality streak that I want to fight so bad, it consumes that last molecule of energy out of my system. 
Today was one such day, I let it happen to me. Then I hit the gym after calling a friend who is my favorite sorrow pillow. I thought, reflected, got angry and even had a red nose exhibiting my emotions. I was done and was picked up my my husband (who like every single day in life stood by me in ups and down- ever since I met him). He stood there, even today, held my hand and assured me without words that his love for me was way above everything else. My daughter in the back seat of the car tried hiding the sushi and my favorite calorie bomb- Semla she bought to make it a special evening for me- she made a genuine effort. 
Less words than usual through the 10 minutes drive, we reached home and I opened the door to hear a 'Hey mamma' from my son. I took my shoes off and somehow suddenly it felt like I took my sadness off. I was now in an environment with love around me- with an acceptance for who I am. The person who is true to herself, who lets herself gets sad, get frustrated, get angry. Maybe that's what allows me to get happy, content and appreciative of all the good, most important people and situations in my life. 
As I am writing this, I am realizing how lucky, happy I feel in this moment. Thanks for those who love me, thanks to those who have problems with me- you make my life richer- helping me realize what to value most. 
Lesson learnt- Dare to feel.

Way too long

It's been way too long that I posted something. I missed it- the flow of thoughts on the blog. Many a times the situation and the lesson of life was so evident to be shared with everyone, but I got caught up. So here I am- reporting a mix of so many things that have happened lately.
Life is certainly a school and I am certainly a student.
So here is a more organized, in a nutshell life lessons:
1. A trip to Dublin with family, the four of us- beautiful place, kind people and a weather that is so diverse hour after hour, it makes you believe that things will get better. How important and acknowledging it was to realize that we didn't need our screens, that we actually had so much to talk about with each other, so much to share, so much to discuss- that we 4 actually, genuinely love each other, that we like each other's company.No, it is not obvious even if 2 of them literally came out of me and the 3rd one ...ehm ehm... I do not take love and respect for granted and I was so relieved that I was surrounded by it- from the 3 people in my life who mean the world to me. Make sure my friends to keep giving yourselves opportunities to get that feeling, create situations in life where you every once in a while can check if YOU need to do something for a betterment.

2. My son, soon 14 - came home 1 hour late from the promised time - 5 pm! Not the end of the world, but I got annoyed at the fact that he called up to 'tell' me than to 'ask'. Talk about being a tight ass! So from the moment he called to tell till he came- it was an hour. That hour made me so confused, I might have lost my physical balance. Am I being too strict, am I overanalyzing, am I forgetting where I come from, (the worry that I might have created during my teenage where we didn't have phones to call and report), what was most annoying in his late coming- should I ground him for a month or just next few hours???!! Like I have mentioned - not born a parent!
So, my boy arrived, came right in and gave me a hug after I opened the door and started walking without saying anything. His heart was beating really fast... I asked him i he was ok. He was ok- but he said he ran as fast as he could from the bus stop as he was worried that I'd be annoyed. He said he was sorry.
I think I need not say no more: It will be Indian take away today- his and mine absolute favorite. My husband and daughter have a different taste in food.
Lesson learned- Sometimes results come later than expected...

3. My work is going great! I love going to work and I feel like it is my second home. I have worked in this place for soon 8 years. We have a Friday Fika- look up the word Fika!
So this time it was my turn to bring in something to sweeten the Friday. I am proud to announce that after all these years, I baked a cheesecake to bring to work! This is my world is the ultimate acknowledgement that I love my work. I actually made an effort at work for something that had nothing to do with work- just to do with how I feel at work.
Thanks to my colleagues who like me, I like you too. Those who don't, I am happy that you exist and want to make me do my job better:)

4. Yoga- Yes, when an Indian (with a mom who explains the breathing technique on phone, sounding weird almost every time) actually starts paying to do the same, something must've happened. Me and my husband discovered Yoga and e were at or second private class yesterday. Fun, amazing and with a sore body today, we are still talking about how fun it was to do it together. Never too late to listen to your body and your soul- and your mom!

So, here you go- a few things. But there is so much more that I'd like to share. I realized that I like doing it, and I promise that I will.
Have a fantastic day!